Thursday, August 31, 2006

Happy to be here...

So I had a bit of a scare today.

The last several days I've been feeling a bit of pain from my armpit when I would lie on my left side. It wasn't bad at all, just a bit uncomfortable. Yesterday I had N. check it out for me. (You know it's love when she'll check your pits for ya!) She said she couldn't really feel anything unusual, that it might be a strained muscle or a tendon or something like that. I still had trouble with it last night, but once again it wasn't too bad.

This morning I'm in the shower and decided to check it out more thoroughly. Soapy wet fingers in my pit... oh yea. Holy Crap, I found a bump! It was rather big (don't mistake me, it felt HUGE!) and deep inside my armpit. Now I've had lumps before, but they are always in the boobs, never in the pit! Long family history of those boobie problems, so I don't screw around with them... I get them checked ASAP!

The phone call 10 minutes later:
N: Hello
S: I need you to make me a doctor's appointment.
N: Wha?
S: This thing in my pit is bigger, and hurts more...
N: OK, so I'll make it for Monday.
S: Huh?
N: Yeah, like you think you're going to get an appointment today?
S: OK, whatever

Well she loves me I tell you, because she managed to get me an appointment for the same day... not even two hours later I was sitting in the doctor's office.

Making it short let's just say that the doc gave me shit for not getting a regular mammogram. I used to get them every 6 months because I've had so many problems. Then she started feeling around. (Have you ever noticed that when the doc is feeling around in semi-intimate places that they never look AT you? I find that disconcerting!) After a while she found the offending knot and started squeezing it. OUCH! Man, I jumped about a foot but she didn't stop. After what seemed like an eternity of squeezing and prodding silently, she started talking while squeezing and prodding. "I don't think this is a lymph node... no, it's too far away from the normal location." She was looking at my face while feeling at this point, but soon she looked away again and said, "No, this is more like a swollen sweat gland".

WHAT? you're shitting me! I came to the doctor for a swollen sweat gland. My embarrassment at this silliness was overshadowed by my happiness that it wasn't serious.

So after getting my clothes on and having only momentary thoughts of giving her a big thank you kiss, I flew right out of that doctor's office!!

If my worst problem is a swollen sweat gland... oh man, I'm a lucky one!

Now I have to get N. to get me a gynecologist appointment.
Then they can give me a mammogram... If you haven't had one yet, let me clue you in... they're no picnic. Imagine lying on your cold garage floor with no shirt. Then imagine some sweet and well-meaning lady driving her car over your exposed tit... if you can wrap your brain around that thought, you will know what it is like.

Anyone know any lesbian gynos in Berlin?

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